Dynamite Dog
HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE TWO DUCK HUNTERS FROM WISCONSIN? ABSOLUTELY A
TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE
INCIDENT.A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly
payments of $690.00).
He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin. It’s mid-winter;
and of course all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys go out on the ice
with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR.
They decide they want to make a natural-looking open water for the
ducks to focus on, somewhere for the decoys to float. Now making a hole in
the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little
more power than the average drill auger can produce. So, out of the back of
the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse. Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to
run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the
Navigator), decide on the following course of action:They light the 40-second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw
the stick of dynamite as far away as possible. Remember a couple of
paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, The GUNS, and the DOG?
Let’s talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING,
especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: The dog takes
off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite,
with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.
The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in
their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at
the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his Master, keeps
coming. One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The
shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black
Lab.
The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on. Another
shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and
of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane. The dog
takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on
the truck touches the dog’s rear end, he yelps, drops the dynamite under the
truck and takes off after his master.
Then ” “” “” “” “” BOOOOOOOOOOOOM “” “” “” “” !
The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake,
leaving the two idiots standing there with “I can’t believe this just happened”
look on their faces.
The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by Illegal
use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he still had yet to
make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.
The dog is okay. . doing fine. And you thought Rednecks only live in the South.
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There are 2 Comments to "Dynamite Dog"
By the time lakes are frozen over in Wisconsin duck hunting season is over. No one ever hunts like this. Nor can you use #8 shot for duck hunting. It would be illegal and couldn’t kill even a small duck. A “highly trained” lab would indicate that the hunters knew what they were doing. No one is this stupid. Anti-hunters love these stories, but that doesn’t make them true.
Just a clip I picked up on the internet–totally unsubstantiated. Seemed funny to me, but if you were offended, HARD CHEESE.
I confess to not being a hunter, but neither do I have a bias against hunters. And I know plenty of people this stupid, none from Wisconsin, and most not into hunting. Have a good day!