From the Boston Herald
Republicans suffering from any of these symptoms should consider seeking medical attention:
-You find yourself saying more frequently, “Dan Quayle, now there was one heck of a vice-president!”
-You support Second Amendment rights, but do not have the slightest interest in shooting your hunting partner.
-Just once, you would love to hear Dick Cheney say, “It is classified information, but I’ll shout it to the world: My ATM pin code is Q-U-I-N-T-U-P-L-E-B-Y-P-A-S-S!”
-You hope the next time America recklessly enters into war using faulty intelligence, it will be completely President Bush’s idea.
-You are having second thoughts about awarding Halliburton a no-bid contract to remodel your bathroom.
-You are starting to question the logic that Dick Cheney is not part of the executive branch because he belongs to Sam’s Club.
-You are getting tired of receiving holiday cards from an undisclosed location.
-You question whether being confined indefinately in Guantanamo prison is excessive punishment for failing to yield at a rotary.
-You are not willing to pay Scooter Libby to mow your lawn until his presidential pardon comes through.
-The FBI agent tapping your phone without a warrant keeps changing your order from mushroom to pepperoni pizza.
-You feel it would be improper for Dick Cheney to testify before a congressional oversight committee but would not mind seeing him raked over the coals by Judge Maria Lopez.